Record of Wortenia War - Corrections Topic

lovelight

This is the dedicated topic for posting suggested corrections for Record of Wortenia War.

Currently in prepublication: Volume 11!

Terabyte

Volume 9 - Part 1:

~~[Generic] The name Kouichirou is written 61 times as Koichiro in this part. (Or did the name change at some point?)~~ It's confirmed that the name's been changed to Koichiro.
[6%] monikers, “the nightless cities”, these districts ► Move the comma inside the quotes.
[26%] his orders until now, Zhen had been struggling to ► It should be Zheng.
[59%] they said ‘help us to some of your coins’, but ► Move the comma inside the quotes.
[82%] but it looks like they’d seen their share of battles. ► It should be they’ve.

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Volume 9 - Part 2:

~~[Generic] The name Kouichirou is written another 44 times as Koichiro in this part.~~
- @ZackZeal could you confirm what the correct name is? Also, Grindiana's surname as well since I'm still confused about it, too. 😋
[20%] attacked identified himself as Koichiro Mikoshiba.. ► Duplicate period. ~~Also, see Generic issue above.~~
~~[59%] queen, the Vixen of the North, Grindiana Helnecharles. ► It should be Helnescharles (additional s)?~~
[64%] northern front armies, marshalled by the crown prince. ► It should be marshaled (US spelling).

ZackZeal

@Terabyte said in Record of Wortenia War - Corrections Topic:

could you confirm what the correct name is? Also, Grindiana's surname as well since I'm still confused about it, too.

It's Koichiro - no long vowels, hence Ryoma being Ryoma and not Ryouma.
Grindiana's surname is Helnecharles.

Terabyte

@ZackZeal Thanks for the clarification. I've edited my posts. 😉

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Volume 9 - Part 3:

[11%] I did everything I could. The only left to do now is to ► It should be only thing.
[19%] called the “Petals of the Northern Wind”, a group ► Move the comma inside the quotes.
[22%] Petals of the North Wind would be sold off to slavery. ► It should be Northern.
[28%] this. The Northern Wind Petals tried to make a living ► It should be Petals of the Northern Wind?
[67%] insert10.jpg ► The illustration is already used at 42%. The one here is either a duplicate placed wrongly or it should be a different image.

ZackZeal

@Terabyte said in Record of Wortenia War - Corrections Topic:

[67%] insert10.jpg ► The illustration is already used at 42%. The one here is either a duplicate placed wrongly or it should be a different image.

Fixed!

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Volume 9 - Part 4:

[3%] positions of ensuring the fort’s defences and being in ► It should be defenses (US spelling).
[15%] of Joshua’s forces, though; Only a few hundred to ► It should be either a period or only (lowercase).
[23%] countries in all directions, meaning Shadina couldn’t ► It should be Shardina.
[25%] knights were compared to commoners, It could be ► It should be it (lowercase).
[35%] Rising from the bed, he rings the bell sitting at his ► It should be rang?
[45%] it would burn if the fire were to begin from =within. ► Remove extra = character.
[46%] As mighty a Fort Notis may be, all of its defensive ► It should be as?
[53%] “What?! What in the world happened...!?” Moore’s ► This series uses ?! usually.
[60%] “Wh-Why....?” ► It should be 3 periods.
[63%] the Wortenia Peninsula in the Kingdom of Rhodesia. ► It should be Rhoadseria.

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Volume 9 - Part 5:

[11%] Sara didn’t notice the way her shoulders shivered, ► Given the context, it should be did?
[24%] it would have been more lethal,but ordinary water ► Missing space.
[28%] He went from a vertical slash to an horizontal one. ► It should be a.
[28%] The surrounding O&’ltormean and Helnesgoulan ► It should be O’ltormean. Remove &.
[50%] Everyone was confident Moore was waning. ► It should be winning.
[53%] Moore would pay a steep price, And once he used ► It should be and (lowercase).
[55%] upper left position, and as it travelled to the right, ► It should be traveled (US spelling).
[97%] in these conditions.In which case, there could ► Missing space.

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Volume 9 - Part 6:

[4%] the meaning of the phrase, ‘ignorance is bliss’.. ► Duplicate period + move the period inside the quotes.
[36%] tormented Chris for a long time, The young knight ► It should be a period.
[40%] the God of Light Meneos was worshipped, and the ► It should be worshiped (US spelling).
[61%] go ahead and do that,” The Pope clapped his hands ► It should be the (lowercase)?
[86%] father worrying over his daughter’s wellbeing,” He said. ► It should be he (lowercase)?
[95%] that much, the conclusion he’d come towas obvious. ► It should be to was (space).
[99%] who helped with the publishing of volume 7, as well ► It should be volume 9?

Hephaestus13

Hi @ZackZeal see below for errors I have found and some oddities that may need correcting :) Thanks a bunch for getting this translated!

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Volume 09 - Part 1:

[23%] But from the time he received his orders until now, Zhen had been ► Correct to Zheng Already mentioned
[30%] At that moment, Liu had made himself into a precision ► Correct to Zheng

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Volume 09 - Part 2:

[23%] "Yes, the mystery man we attacked identified himself as Koichiro Mikoshiba.. ► Correct to one or three full-stops
[35%] "Is It really you, Koichiro...?" ► Correct to Lowercase

===

Volume 09 - Part 3:

[5%] The only left to do now is to keep believing and move forward. ► Add thing Already mentioned
[35%] And among those monsters, the Eagle Lord was considered on a class that was ► Should this be in?
1. 'And among those monsters, the Eagle Lord was considered in a class that was'
[52%] Ryoma's hands scanned over the Kikoku, the sword sheathed at his waist, ► Consider removing - no other named swords have been given the same treatment with 'the' placed before them that I can remember. Also can't see the point of it.
[58%] The air rumbled as little by little as two twisters formed, accompanied by the rolling of thunder. ► Remove one or the other
1. 'The air rumbled little by little as two twisters formed, accompanied by the rolling of thunder.'
2. 'The air rumbled as little by little two twisters formed, accompanied by the rolling of thunder.'

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Volume 09 - Part 4:

[15%] Reading his commander's resolve from his expression, the aide nods. ► Correct to nodded
~~[23%] True, given how much stronger knights were compared to commoners, It could be quelled ► Lowercase the 'It'~~ Already mentioned
[30%] Rising from the bed, he rings the bell sitting at his bedside ► Correct to rang Already mentioned
~~[38%] it would burn if the fire were to begin from =within. ► Remove '='~~ Already mentioned
[38%] Everyone was saying whatever came to mind, and the Xaroodian soldiers ► Correct to Helnesgoulan
[46%] Don't be shy and put as much as possible! ► Add on OR correct to use
1. 'Don't be shy and put on as much as possible!'
2. 'Don't be shy and use as much as possible!'
[46%] Surprised to find that Moore had already changed into his armor, the aide continues. ► Correct to continued
[53%] Normally, no one would have worked up the nerve to stand in the way of someone in such a loft station. ► Correct to lofty
[53%] the governor of the Wortenia Peninsula in the Kingdom of Rhodesia. ► Correct to Rhodseria Already mentioned
[69%] Watching them leave, Moore nods lightly and turns to Ryoma, who was still smiling and made no signs of moving. ► Correct to nodded AND turned
1. 'Watching them leave, Moore nodded lightly and turned to Ryoma, who was still smiling and made no signs of moving.'
[69%] They couldn't afford to make the fact a chief vassal of the Empire was murdered in the Emperor's castle and that his killer got away known to the general public. ► Please add some punctuation... especially before known

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Volume 09 - Part 5:

[0%] A chime-like voice accompanied by the clatter of clangering armor reaches her ears. ► Correct to clanging (clangering just sounds wrong and no dictionaries show it) AND reached
1. 'A chime-like voice accompanied by the clatter of clanging armor reached her ears.'
[0%] This issue spans over most of the dialogue on this page, it feels awkward and doesn't clearly differentiate which twin is speaking.
'"Sara, how are things going on your side?"' - then after Sara replies the next dialogue is '"And how did things go on your side?" Laura asked.' ► Should this be Sara, with the Sara in the next dialogue replace with Laura? Is this Laura asking Sara the same thing twice? I can't easily find if one of the twins names are accidentally swapped, so it might be worth going back to the source to find out which order the dialogue is actually in.
[7%] both as a practitioner of thaumaturgy and as warrior. ► Add a
[14%] The next moment, a crescent, invisible something was fired along that slash's trajectory, ► Consider adding of
1. 'The next moment, a crescent, of invisible something was fired along that slash's trajectory,'
~~[21%] or rock it would have been more lethal,but ordinary water didn't have ► Add space~~ Already mentioned
[21%] Why was he doing so deliberately? ► Consider adding it
1. 'Why was he doing it so deliberately?'
~~[28%] The surrounding O&'ltormean and Helnesgoulan knights ► Remove &~~ Already mentioned
~~[42%] Everyone was confident Moore was waning. ► Either Moore is winning or Ryoma is waning.~~ Already mentioned
[50%] By comparison, a typical one-handed sword weighs an average 1.5 kilograms. ► Consider adding of
[85%] Multiple mentions of Julianus the first do not have I after them which is contradictory to the usage in Part 6.
[85%] Julanus' heart, by contrast, was overcome by an odd sensation that had clouded over his heart. ► Correct to Julianus' OR Julianus I's ALSO consider revising the double use of heart.
1. 'Julianus' heart, by contrast, was overcome by an odd sensation that had clouded over his mind.'
2. 'Julianus I's heart, by contrast, was overcome by an odd sensation that had clouded over his mind.'
3. 'Julianus, by contrast, was overcome by an odd sensation that had clouded over his heart.'
[85%] Your Majesty, and that's why i'm confident that you will agree ► Capitalise the I
~~[92%] O'ltormea's land was impossible in these conditions.In which case, ► Add space~~ Already mentioned

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Volume 09 - Part 6:

[6%] Anything Julianus did now would likely fail ► Correct to Julianus I
[25%] Its southern borders were constantly in a constant state of tension. ► Reword as it is clumsy use of wording.
1. 'Its southern borders were constantly in a state of tension.'
2. 'Its southern borders were constantly in a state of perpetual tension.'
[25%] "Yes, I'll have to return to Rhoadseria per haste, as well... ► Correct to post
1. '"Yes, I'll have to return to Rhoadseria post haste, as well...'
[31%] To that end, she wanted to see him to come to the correct answer on his own. ► Remove as superfluous
1. 'To that end, she wanted to see him come to the correct answer on his own.'
[50%] It's impossible, and Julianus knows it. ► Correct to Julianus I
[50%] "... with that army still in their hands, and pulling that army back..." ► Correct to lands
[56%] After a few moments of long silence, the man suddenly spoke. ► Consider rearranging words
1. 'After a few long moments of silence, the man suddenly spoke.'
[56%] "Yes. We'll scout things out so if he's in league with them, and if he isn't..." ► Correct to to see
1. '"Yes. We'll scout things out to see if he's in league with them, and if he isn't..."'
[68%] continents could only summon a few hundred otherworlders every day. ► Check, but should correct to year
1. 'continents could only summon a few hundred otherworlders every year. '
[68%] And the people it summoned were essentially selected in random. ► Correct to at
1. 'And the people it summoned were essentially selected at random.'
~~[93%] After hearing that much, the conclusion he'd come towas obvious. ► Add space~~ Already mentioned
~~[93%] I would like to extend my thanks to the editors who helped with the publishing of volume 7, as well ► Correct to 9~~ Already mentioned

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Volume 10 - Part 1:

[42%] the recoil of that movement travelled up from ► It should be traveled (US spelling).
[43%] It relied not on cancelling out the attack with ► It should be canceling (US spelling).
[50%] The principal behind it was simple: the attack ► It should be principle.

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Volume 10 - Part 2:

[8%] explanation for such an heroic feat, perhaps. ► It should be a.

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Volume 10 - Part 3:

[Generic] The name Gelhart is wrongly written 4 times as Gerhalt (L & R switched around).
[17%] who wanted Ryoma dead, espeically people from ► It should be especially.
[53%] As far as Ryoma knew, Mihkail had committed at ► It should be Mikhail.
[54%] His second blunder occured when Ryoma crossed ► It should be occurred.

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Volume 10 - Part 4:

[74%] Whomever was handicked for this position must have ► It should be handpicked.

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Volume 10 - Part 5:

[29%] I can offer you a little something something.” ► Duplicate something.
[45%] In this kind of world, prostiution proved to ► It should be prostitution.
[51%] Normally, prostetution contracts forced the ► It should be prostitution.
[64%] change it. Tthe Organization wasn’t a charity ► It should be The.

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Volume 10 - Part 6:

[24%] However, The Organization had to be the one to ► It should be the (lowercase).
[73%] “Can I ask why?” Helena continued. “ I see you ► Remove extra space.
[85%] you want my acknowledgement, you should at least ► It should be acknowledgment (US spelling).

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Volume 11 - Part 1:

[24%] with Sirius.This was a natural development. ► Missing space.
[25%] by thick forests. Travelling across Wortenia, ► It should be Traveling (US spelling).
[27%] and Epirus was short. monster attacks were ► It should be Monster (Capitalized).
[51%] the kind of tea one wouldn’t usually serve to ► It should be would.

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Volume 11 - Part 2:

[41%] the surrounding terrain for defence and were ► It should be defense (US spelling).
[47%] Time, however, Ryoma was going up against ► It should be This time.
[55%] His protégé, Toyotomi helped paved the way ► It should be pave.
[90%] “Hehehe, Ahahaha! I’m surprised they never ► It should be ahahaha (lowercase).
[99%] “I’ll leave it to you.” Then then reached for a ► It should be Then he. Or just remove the duplicate then?

Gamen

V11P3
[0%] He was also the owner of the mistel Company -> Mistel