My Friend's Little Sister Has It In for Me! - Corrections Topic

myskaros

This is the dedicated topic for posting suggested corrections for My Friend's Little Sister Has It In for Me!

Currently in prepublication: Volume 1! - link to discussion topic

Terabyte

Volume 1 - Part 1:

[33%] think she was my girlfriend.. Sometimes in life, ► Duplicate period.

SomeOldGuy

12%:
This girl was Kohinata Iroha. She was a freshman at my highschool (I was a sophomore).
Is this a localization to the US standard of 4-year high schools? I've usually seen the descriptions as freshman, junior, and senior when it wasn't done as first/second/third-year.

pcj

I'm going to have to agree on the school years thing... if he's talking with his uncle about getting an after-high-school job it makes much more sense for him to be a junior or senior rather than a sophomore. And if this is a Japanese high school, "freshman" and "sophomore" can't both exist in the same school. Have to pick one of the two and stick with it, and the other two are junior and senior. If the point is to show that they're a year apart and he's a 2nd year, it would be better to describe them as sophomore and junior. My reasoning: from the plot so far, it seems like it's more relevant to show how close they are to graduating than it is to show that she's a 1st year. Also, in my town in the US, the high school is 10-12 grade (9th is part of the middle school) and the 10th graders are called sophomores still.

Rawon

@SomeOldGuy and @pcj
Thanks for weighing in with your thoughts! We discussed it a bit and, moving forward, will replace "freshman" and "sophomore" with "first-year" and "second-year" respectively. I'll go through the future parts to make sure these changes are reflected there, too!

@Terabyte
Thanks for the correction. I'd already gone ahead and changed it, but I figure I'll acknowledge it here, too.

Moving forward, I'll put a Like on posts once I've seen them, rather than post a reply every time; appreciate you folk looking out as well!

amit34521

At 10%, I noticed that the 5th was mentioned as 05th which looks weird. I don't remember the ordinal number mentions to have a prefix 0.

pcj

@amit34521 it's a reference. It's parodying a gaming company called "07th Expansion" and their trademark had the leading 0.

amit34521

@pcj Thanks for info. Learnt something new. The cclaw translations didn't mention anything about this and technically ordinal naming has no prefixes to numbers hence had that doubt.

Terabyte

Volume 1 - Part 3:

[Generic] There are 3 instances of counselling that should be counseling (US spelling).
[37%] on her face rivalling any hentai heroine. ► It should be rivaling (US spelling).
[65%] through the building, signalling the end of ► It should be signaling (US spelling).
[94%] “I-I’dnever...” ► It should be I’d never (space).

pcj

Volume 1 - Part 3

[9%] What happened between now and then for her to end up like this? → should be then and now
[99%] Why was I getting so flustered now, after every that just happened? → should be everything

Terabyte

Volume 1 - Part 4:

[88%] “Nothin’ phases you, huh? You’re allowed to get mad, ► It should be fazes.

Terabyte

Volume 1 - Part 5:

[8%] Since you’re my neighbour and all, I was thinkin’ ► It should be neighbor (US spelling).
[10%] only a matter of time before someone'd run and ► It should be someone’d (different ’ ).
[31%] saying the word ‘love’. You don’t love anything ► Move the period inside the quotes.
[75%] having picked up on the strange crack in my voice ► Missing period.

pcj

Volume 1 - Part 6

[64%] Iroha lent her chin on her folded arms atop the railings and looked at me sideways. >> should be leaned (lent is the past tense of lend)
[69%] it was strange that not of the twenty actors involved were credited. >> should be none

Terabyte

Volume 1 - Part 7:

[20%] Maybe it'd be enough to just get Iroha ► It should be it’d (different ’ ).

Rawon

@Terabyte said in My Friend's Little Sister Has It In for Me! - Corrections Topic:

Volume 1 - Part 7:

[20%] Maybe it'd be enough to just get Iroha ► It should be it’d (different ’ ).

That'll teach me to edit out mistakes as the part goes live...

Thanks as ever for being on the look-out for these!

pcj

Volume 1 - Part 8

[6%] Iroha jabbed her finger into their chests and glared as she brought her face closer to theirs. >> one finger, more than one chest? The way it's written sounds like she only jabbed once, did she actually jab them one after the other?
[38%] I know how to keep stumm. >> I had to look this up, never heard it before. Turns out it's because it's not English. It's German. And it makes perfect sense in context (mute/silent). I'm guessing the original text had the German word, too? Not really a correction, just wanted to comment on it :)

Rawon

@pcj

Hey, thanks! I agree that the first line reads a bit odd, so I'll consult with the translator how we can satisfyingly fix it. My first thought is to just go "she jabbed her finger at them", since the image just shows her pointing menacingly and it hopefully makes enough sense.

For the second one, I don't actually know the original Japanese (I could look it up, but there's a reason I'm the editor and not the TL), but it's sometimes used in English, too. We'll have to think about keeping it as-is, or replacing it to make it easier to read. Gotta balance "expanding vocabulary" with "keeping it accessible" after all.

Thanks for the comments, appreciate you bringing it up!

Shiny

@Rawon said in My Friend's Little Sister Has It In for Me! - Corrections Topic:

For the second one, I don't actually know the original Japanese (I could look it up, but there's a reason I'm the editor and not the TL), but it's sometimes used in English, too. We'll have to think about keeping it as-is, or replacing it to make it easier to read. Gotta balance "expanding vocabulary" with "keeping it accessible" after all.

For reference, I've heard the term but would have assumed it would be written as schtum (although when I saw it written as stumm I immediately read it as the same word without a second thought). I am from England and it's not a word I've ever really used, it's just one I've read and heard a few times over the years and have always immediately understood from the context.