Are You Okay With a Slightly Older Girlfriend? - Corrections Topic
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This is the dedicated topic for posting suggested corrections for Are You Okay With a Slightly Older Girlfriend?
Currently in prepublication: Volume 2!
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V1P1 53%:
wereemphasised
even more than before
emphasized for 'Merican English.
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@SomeOldGuy Thanks, fixed! I swapped in the zed, just like our founding fathers intended.
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Volume 1 - Part 1:
- [Generic] There are
8 instances
of4 consecutive periods
instead of 3 periods. - [24%] were beautifully
proportioned. .
Her face had ► Remove extraperiod
. - [26%] her pleated skirt, perfectly
sized,,
neither too ► Duplicatecomma
. - [40%] curious looks and
voices.There
were even some ► Missing space. - [51%] walking pace I heard, “
Wa, wait
! Please wait!” ► It should be Wa-wait (dash)? - [63%] shamed, you put yourself in harm’s way
right?
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. - [72%] “Come on...don’t say that it’s
embarrassing..”
► A couple of issues:- It should be 3 periods. (Or duplicate
period
?) - Hime keeps talking in the next paragraph/dialogue, remove the
closing double quote
here.
- It should be 3 periods. (Or duplicate
- [76%] you talking about, what exactly have I
betrayed?
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. - [79%] in high school, I actually want to get a girlfriend.
”
► Kaoru keeps talking in the next paragraph/dialogue, remove theclosing double quote
here. - [79%] “...
also
, we never drank champagne, that was ► It should be Also (Capitalized)? - [90%] give me advice that’s too high-level, you know
?.”
► Remove extraperiod
. - [95%] forming that dumb
“Virgins for Life Alliance”.
► Move the period inside the quotes.
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Volume 1 - Part 2:
- [Generic] There are
22 instances
of4 consecutive periods
instead of 3 periods. - [6%] lunch box from the
totebag
she was carrying. ► It should be tote bag (space). - [21%] your last name means
‘peaches’,
you’d think ► Move the comma inside the quotes. - [45%] guy does his best to
‘take action’,
he’ll just ► Move the comma inside the quotes. - [57%] “...Let’s not go after
all
” ► Missing punctuation. - [69%] “...
pfft
” ► It should be Pfft. (Capitalized + punctuation). - [69%] “
Hahaha
” ► Missing punctuation. - [84%] I likely didn’t need the
“probably”.
But these ► Move the period inside the quotes. - [88%] to be able to call this raging feeling
“love”.
► Move the period inside the quotes. - [97%] “I’m sorry... I’m so, sorry...
s-sorry
” ► Missing punctuation.
- [Generic] There are
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@Terabyte Thanks, Terabyte! I appreciate your time. I've gone ahead and applied your corrections.
As far as the "4 consecutive periods" thing goes, those were representing an ellipsis along with a period to end a complete sentence, and it's actually the style I'm used to using. That said, I get the impression that people tend to prefer 3 dots for every instance of an ellipsis, so I've decided to go ahead and switch Parts 1 and 2 to the always-3-dots style, and I will maintain that style for future parts.
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@Zubonjin Yeah, every other LN on this site basically uses 3 dots so seeing 4 just felt wrong somehow. Thanks for making the change. 👍
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Volume 1 - Part 3:
- [78%] “I get it... I get it,
okay?.
The one you ► Duplicatepunctuation
. - [84%] I became more of an adult
then
Nube. ► It should be than. - [84%] as you’d expect it was a huge
shock.
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
- [78%] “I get it... I get it,
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@Terabyte Thank you!
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Volume 1 - Part 4
- [74%] “What are you saying...? I properly turned you down right? This conversation was over, wasn’t it? → the following paragraph is a different person speaking, so this is missing the ending quote.
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@pcj Thanks pcj!
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Volume 1 - Part 4:
- [3%] if it were a
15 year old
girl and a27 year old
man in a ► It should be 15-year-old / 27-year-old (hyphens). - [5%] on and on like
“I’m still young! Somebody marry me~”
► Double quotesinside double quotes
. Use single quotes and add also the dialogue's closing double quote at the end: ‘I’m still young! Somebody marry me~’” - [8%] even a good one, just hurry up and come back to
reality.
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. - [34%] to be a high school girl and deceiving a
15 year old
boy. ► It should be 15-year-old (hyphens). - [35%] and relax” and took
her son
with him to his parents’ house. ► It should be their son? - [72%] the Mega Man in
Smash Brothers
is actually the original, ► It should be Smash Bros to keep it consistent. [76%] you down right? This conversation was over,Already reported.wasn’t it?
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.- [86%] I can do is this cheap castle,” he says
apologetically
► Missing period.
- [3%] if it were a
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@Terabyte Thanks Terabyte!
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10% A 15-year-old and a 17-year-old dating definitely isn't normal.
I'm sure the lady would be flattered, but she's a 27-year-old, not a 17-year-old.
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@jcochran Thank you!
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Volume 1 - Part 5:
- [9%] on out is where it gets really tough, you
know?
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. - [55%] lovey-dovey you are is out of the
question.
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. - [63%] suddenly Ura, in a very small voice,
murmured,
► Paragraph ends with acomma
, merge the following dialogue?
- [9%] on out is where it gets really tough, you
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@Terabyte Thanks!
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36% "N-No, its fine... Actually, I'm sorry! I was heavy, wasn't I?!"
"N-No, it's fine... Actually, I'm sorry! I was heavy, wasn't I?!"One of the duplicates ought to be deleted. I'd suggest keeping the second one since it's using "it's" instead of "its".
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@jcochran Thank you!
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Volume 1 - Part 7:
- [Generic] This part contains insert9.jpg and part 6 had insert7.jpg. There's a missing
insert8.jpg
somewhere. - [73%] happen to me earlier, so now we’re
even.
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. - [74%] “Okay... do you want to look
again?
► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
- [Generic] This part contains insert9.jpg and part 6 had insert7.jpg. There's a missing
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@Terabyte Thank you! I've fixed the text for now, and the image should be included in the near future; I'll edit this post once that gets sorted out.
Edit: The image has now been added!