Demon Lord, Retry! - Corrections Topic

lovelight

This is the dedicated topic for posting suggested corrections for Demon Lord, Retry!

Currently in prepublication: Volume 7!

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 1:

[32%] but simply an acknowledgement that humans were ► It should be acknowledgment (US spelling).
[51%] voice and shouted. hat tasted like plain-old water ► It should be What?
[85%] the manufactured sense of fulfilment. At this rate, ► It should be fulfillment (US spelling).

SomeOldGuy

V6 P2 27%:
Nowm he planned to renovate the structure for actual battle.
Now

31%:
Xenobia became Zenobia.

36%:
“How... Could this have happened...!?”
could

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 2:

[12%] one and only weakness, And intended to take her ► It should be and (lowercase).
[26%] ceremonial purposes until now. Nowm he planned ► It should be Now. (And, maybe, change the preceding until now with so far to avoid a duplicate?)
[28%] What merit is there and you cutting down the beast ► It should be in.
[31%] “Certainly, you jest.” Azur deeply bowed, as if ► Remove the comma?
~~[32%] all tools at my disposal. Zenobia, the Tzardom, ► It should be Xenobia.~~ Already reported.
[35%] such extreme lengths in a foreign nation...? “ ► The dialogue's closing double quote is wrongly a starting one. Also, remove the extra space before it.
[55%] Hanzo spread her fan and snickered, seeing how ► It should be Kongming.
[72%] and silverware. One one would find it difficult to ► Duplicate one.
[94%] a similar expression. There was so sign of valor ► It should be no.

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 3:

[9%] closest being to the Great Light and consider its voice ► It should be considered.
[93%] our job,” Monkey Magic chimed in. We’re gonna party ► The dialogue's starting double quote is missing.
[94%] Monkey Magic said as h pointed to Weeb. He glared ► It should be he pointed.

SomeOldGuy

V6 P4 40%:
In fact, he was sure that the people’s hearts would leave the Demon Lord at once, their grudge leading to the/ inevitable revolution that he feared above all.
Stray slash character.

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 4:

~~[40%] their grudge leading to the/ inevitable revolution ► Remove random / character.~~ Already reported.
[69%] “Um..! You’ll get your hands dirty, Master Demon ► It should be 3 periods.
[76%] their skin was supple and their hair were luscious. ► It should be was?

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 5:

[9%] “Your blushing, Grandpa. That’s kind of cute, ► It should be You’re.
[49%] so I’m going to set up a refuge, just in case. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
[93%] Neither of them seem troubled by the number, ► It should be seemed?

SomeOldGuy

V6 P5 50%:
There was a second-floor loft that left to the attic.
Really think this should be led

65%:
demanding to see the Demon Lord in flesh.
in the flesh is more common

96%:
blot out the son
sun to make the metaphor work

SomeOldGuy

V6 P6 0%:
suggestive of consistent modifications by Yu.
Not sure if consistent is the correct word here. Either constant or ongoing would be more appropriate.

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 7:

[0%] foremen issuing similar sentiments their workers. ► It should be similar statements to?
[29%] becomes stagnant before completely breaking down. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
[44%] on the other hand, wanted to demand Tahar tell him ► It should be Tahara.
[59%] insert6.jpg ► Either it's the wrong illustration or the wrong place.
[66%] “There’s the booze! This is what I’ve been waiting for! ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
[76%] as well as water wheels,caves, and mossy rocks that ► Missing space.
[81%] from the guests. Pick any room you want from there. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
[88%] “Let go of me! We’re going up stairs!” Grabbing Tron ► It should be upstairs (no space).

costmuffled

Volume 6, Part 8, 64%:
"His shock therapy might have rocketed Tahara into the opposite direction."
Since Tahara's efforts were directed toward getting Kondo to open up, this should probably be:
"His shock therapy might have rocketed Kondo in the opposite direction."

SomeOldGuy

V6P8 83%:
“No,” the Demon Lord shut down.
Most likely, "shut her down", or even "shot her down".

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 8:

[25%] the driver to shreds and using his skull as a goblet. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
~~[69%] His shock therapy might have rocketed Tahara into ► It should be Kondo?~~ Already reported.
~~[86%] “No,” the Demon Lord shut down. As lenient as he ► It should be shut her.~~ Already reported.

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 9:

[95%] “Let’s begin... Area Modification! The Demon Lord selected ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.

SomeOldGuy

V6 P10 11%:
“She can be quite stubborn, so no amount of persuading from me convinced her to come. My silly little sister, with no idea that she’s playing right into your hand.
Missing closing quote.

Around 20%:
“Where’s the romance in a dark forest...?” the Demon Lord grumbled, puffing out smoke.”
Found the missing quote from above, it's incorrectly placed here.

Around 43%:
Yu dove into his arms and buried her face in her chest.
his

78%:
Considering that him and his advisors had always fought players on their own, he was definitely at an advantage now that he could hire adventurers, militarymen, and even mercenaries.
he

Terabyte

Volume 6 - Part 10:

[Generic] This series uses !? usually but there are 38 instances of ?! in this part.
[2%] and a sixteen year old who never left his room. ► It should be sixteen-year-old (hyphens).
~~[11%] playing right into your hand. The Demon Lord ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.~~ Already reported.
~~[27%] grumbled, puffing out smoke.” Besides, while Luna ► No dialogue here. Remove the extra closing double quote.~~ Already reported.
[37%] blinding speed, augmenting the Demon Lord’s age. ► It should be reducing.
~~[46%] dove into his arms and buried her face in her chest. ► It should be his.~~ Already reported.
[70%] “Are we in... the village of Rabbi...?’ ► The dialogue's closing double quote is wrongly a single one.
[75%] all preplanned, With the land below it leveled ► It should be with (lowercase).

jackknife

Thank you for your support and reports as always, @Terabyte and @SomeOldGuy!

Terabyte

Volume 7 - Part 1:

[29%] ——Hellion Territory, southeast on the continent ► Missing period for consistency.

thefirstpunicwar

V7P2

6% - If you're not joking, kid, your naivety and starting to get funny. ► I think it should be is.

7% - some are there for extra cash, And some girls ► Either cash. And or cash, and It depends on which punctuation you want to use.