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    Demon Lord, Retry! - Corrections Topic

    Prepub Corrections
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    • L
      lovelight Staff last edited by Rahul Balaggan

      This is the dedicated topic for posting suggested corrections for Demon Lord, Retry!

      Currently in prepublication: Volume 6!

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      • Terabyte
        Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

        Volume 6 - Part 1:

        • [32%] but simply an acknowledgement that humans were ► It should be acknowledgment (US spelling).
        • [51%] voice and shouted. hat tasted like plain-old water ► It should be What?
        • [85%] the manufactured sense of fulfilment. At this rate, ► It should be fulfillment (US spelling).
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        • SomeOldGuy
          SomeOldGuy Premium Member last edited by SomeOldGuy

          V6 P2 27%:
          Nowm he planned to renovate the structure for actual battle.
          Now

          31%:
          Xenobia became Zenobia.

          36%:
          “How... Could this have happened...!?”
          could

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          • Terabyte
            Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

            Volume 6 - Part 2:

            • [12%] one and only weakness, And intended to take her ► It should be and (lowercase).
            • [26%] ceremonial purposes until now. Nowm he planned ► It should be Now. (And, maybe, change the preceding until now with so far to avoid a duplicate?)
            • [28%] What merit is there and you cutting down the beast ► It should be in.
            • [31%] “Certainly, you jest.” Azur deeply bowed, as if ► Remove the comma?
            • [32%] all tools at my disposal. Zenobia, the Tzardom, ► It should be Xenobia. Already reported.
            • [35%] such extreme lengths in a foreign nation...? “ ► The dialogue's closing double quote is wrongly a starting one. Also, remove the extra space before it.
            • [55%] Hanzo spread her fan and snickered, seeing how ► It should be Kongming.
            • [72%] and silverware. One one would find it difficult to ► Duplicate one.
            • [94%] a similar expression. There was so sign of valor ► It should be no.
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            • Terabyte
              Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

              Volume 6 - Part 3:

              • [9%] closest being to the Great Light and consider its voice ► It should be considered.
              • [93%] our job,” Monkey Magic chimed in. We’re gonna party ► The dialogue's starting double quote is missing.
              • [94%] Monkey Magic said as h pointed to Weeb. He glared ► It should be he pointed.
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              • SomeOldGuy
                SomeOldGuy Premium Member last edited by

                V6 P4 40%:
                In fact, he was sure that the people’s hearts would leave the Demon Lord at once, their grudge leading to the/ inevitable revolution that he feared above all.
                Stray slash character.

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                • Terabyte
                  Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

                  Volume 6 - Part 4:

                  • [40%] their grudge leading to the/ inevitable revolution ► Remove random / character. Already reported.
                  • [69%] “Um..! You’ll get your hands dirty, Master Demon ► It should be 3 periods.
                  • [76%] their skin was supple and their hair were luscious. ► It should be was?
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                  • Terabyte
                    Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

                    Volume 6 - Part 5:

                    • [9%] “Your blushing, Grandpa. That’s kind of cute, ► It should be You’re.
                    • [49%] so I’m going to set up a refuge, just in case. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
                    • [93%] Neither of them seem troubled by the number, ► It should be seemed?
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                    • SomeOldGuy
                      SomeOldGuy Premium Member last edited by SomeOldGuy

                      V6 P5 50%:
                      There was a second-floor loft that left to the attic.
                      Really think this should be led

                      65%:
                      demanding to see the Demon Lord in flesh.
                      in the flesh is more common

                      96%:
                      blot out the son
                      sun to make the metaphor work

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                      • SomeOldGuy
                        SomeOldGuy Premium Member last edited by

                        V6 P6 0%:
                        suggestive of consistent modifications by Yu.
                        Not sure if consistent is the correct word here. Either constant or ongoing would be more appropriate.

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                        • Terabyte
                          Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

                          Volume 6 - Part 7:

                          • [0%] foremen issuing similar sentiments their workers. ► It should be similar statements to?
                          • [29%] becomes stagnant before completely breaking down. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
                          • [44%] on the other hand, wanted to demand Tahar tell him ► It should be Tahara.
                          • [59%] insert6.jpg ► Either it's the wrong illustration or the wrong place.
                          • [66%] “There’s the booze! This is what I’ve been waiting for! ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
                          • [76%] as well as water wheels,caves, and mossy rocks that ► Missing space.
                          • [81%] from the guests. Pick any room you want from there. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
                          • [88%] “Let go of me! We’re going up stairs!” Grabbing Tron ► It should be upstairs (no space).
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                          • C
                            costmuffled Premium Member last edited by

                            Volume 6, Part 8, 64%:
                            "His shock therapy might have rocketed Tahara into the opposite direction."
                            Since Tahara's efforts were directed toward getting Kondo to open up, this should probably be:
                            "His shock therapy might have rocketed Kondo in the opposite direction."

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                            • SomeOldGuy
                              SomeOldGuy Premium Member last edited by

                              V6P8 83%:
                              “No,” the Demon Lord shut down.
                              Most likely, "shut her down", or even "shot her down".

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                              • Terabyte
                                Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

                                Volume 6 - Part 8:

                                • [25%] the driver to shreds and using his skull as a goblet. ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
                                • [69%] His shock therapy might have rocketed Tahara into ► It should be Kondo? Already reported.
                                • [86%] “No,” the Demon Lord shut down. As lenient as he ► It should be shut her. Already reported.
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                                • Terabyte
                                  Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

                                  Volume 6 - Part 9:

                                  • [95%] “Let’s begin... Area Modification! The Demon Lord selected ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing.
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                                  • SomeOldGuy
                                    SomeOldGuy Premium Member last edited by SomeOldGuy

                                    V6 P10 11%:
                                    “She can be quite stubborn, so no amount of persuading from me convinced her to come. My silly little sister, with no idea that she’s playing right into your hand.
                                    Missing closing quote.

                                    Around 20%:
                                    “Where’s the romance in a dark forest...?” the Demon Lord grumbled, puffing out smoke.”
                                    Found the missing quote from above, it's incorrectly placed here.

                                    Around 43%:
                                    Yu dove into his arms and buried her face in her chest.
                                    his

                                    78%:
                                    Considering that him and his advisors had always fought players on their own, he was definitely at an advantage now that he could hire adventurers, militarymen, and even mercenaries.
                                    he

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                                    • Terabyte
                                      Terabyte Premium Member last edited by

                                      Volume 6 - Part 10:

                                      • [Generic] This series uses !? usually but there are 38 instances of ?! in this part.
                                      • [2%] and a sixteen year old who never left his room. ► It should be sixteen-year-old (hyphens).
                                      • [11%] playing right into your hand. The Demon Lord ► The dialogue's closing double quote is missing. Already reported.
                                      • [27%] grumbled, puffing out smoke.” Besides, while Luna ► No dialogue here. Remove the extra closing double quote. Already reported.
                                      • [37%] blinding speed, augmenting the Demon Lord’s age. ► It should be reducing.
                                      • [46%] dove into his arms and buried her face in her chest. ► It should be his. Already reported.
                                      • [70%] “Are we in... the village of Rabbi...?’ ► The dialogue's closing double quote is wrongly a single one.
                                      • [75%] all preplanned, With the land below it leveled ► It should be with (lowercase).
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                                      • jackknife
                                        jackknife Editors last edited by

                                        Thank you for your support and reports as always, @Terabyte and @SomeOldGuy!

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