@Khazidhea said in To Another World... with Land Mines! - Corrections Topic:

“Yeah, Yuki-san’s magic can crush and extinguish an orc’s head with ease,”

Probably “disintegrate”, “destroy”, or “eliminate”, although any word that makes sense would also make “crush and” redundant, so this sentence needs some work throughout.

This is probably just a case of the first draft of the translation being done by A.I. Like, in English we have “quench”, “extinguish”, and “snuff” which should often be translated into fire-related words, but sometimes they mean “drink”, “murder”, and “murder” respectively, and A.I. can miss that distinction, especially if the intended meaning is the rarer one.

V1P1
~19%

when we were in the cellar library that the previous head of House Lumiole had used.

Extra letter? Lumiole->Lumiol

V1P7
~21%

Two men were holding me down, and there were now other four men surrounding me as well.

Wrong word order? other four->four other

~63%

The opened up the front door, then bowed reverently

Missing letter and missing full stop? The->They and reverently->reverently.

V1P5
~42%

“Forget everything I said. Fight Ashley as if you’re trying to kill him.”

Missing start “? Fight Ashley->“Fight Ashley

V1P9
~15%

“They gather up packs and use those numbers strategically.

Maybe extra word / wrong word? (Sorry if it is okay as it is but I am not see 'gather up packs' before or when search) gather up packs->gather in packs (or gather as packs or gather up)

~46%

As long as you carry the blood of your house, and you have to uphold your family’s honor.”

Extra word or maybe missing more sentence? (Because sentence is start with 'as long as' but is not say what Saki is have to do while the first part is true, maybe extra 'and' because she is have to uphold family honor or maybe missing end of sentence because while she is have the blood from house and have to uphold honor she is can not choose who for marriage.) and you have to->you have to

~77%

Kuhoin style intermediate spirit art... “Piercing Shirke!”

Maybe wrong word/misspell? (Sorry, I am search for Shirke because I am not know word but I can not see anything about word (only shirk) sorry if it is a word from the series or a Japanese word but maybe a misspell of strike or shriek?) Shirke->Shriek (or Strike?)

V3 P1, 54%
When she opens her mouth again it’s to say, “I should have said this far sooner: Both I and my country own all of you a great debt."
Own -> owe

V5P2

29%: "I had returned home after finishing my daily regiment" -> regimen

@Hylebos Thank you for your inquiry! In fact, JNC's style guide calls for "leaped" instead of "leapt," so that is why we have used it here. :-)

Volume 7 part 9 71%

Within under a minute he'd torn out several more,

Within a minute and under a minute mean the same thing, using both is redundant, although within makes more sense in this particular sentance.

v5 p12

~90%

Another reason for their progress was that the Archangel had begun scaling back both the rank and frequency of its healing spells. It never once used the devastating ApE attack from earlier—Judgment Ray—again either. All of it the result of Lyrienne’s strategy.

Should that be AoE attack? As in Area of Effect attack?

v18p8 ~8%:

"I see... That it is an unusual payment system, but not difficult to implement," Orest said.

That it is -> That is, at least based on the current structuring of the sentences.

V1P8
~63%

Of course, can I completely rule out that the thing we’re dealing with is something similar to but not exactly a Hollow? Perhaps.

Maybe missing word? (Because Martina is say why she is think it is a Hollow in sentences before but next is want to say there is a small chance it is something different. At moment it is say she is think she is sure it is a Hollow because she is can perhaps rule out it is something similar but not a Hollow. Sorry if it is okay as it is) Perhaps->Perhaps not

It seems weird to comment on issues in the afterward (specifically the one for volume 2), but it seems like the translation for part of it has to be wrong, because the author is thanking the publisher for being allowed to advertise his "new" work despite it being under a different publisher, and that "new" works is Magic Stone Gourmet.

I must also give thanks for being graciously allowed to advertise my new work in this afterward despite it being under a different publisher. It'll be published under BOOKS and is called Magic Stone Gourmet.

The first volume of Sundering Fate was published in Japan in August of 2022 (and the second volume was published in March of 2023). The most recent volume of Magic Stone Gourmet was published in Japan in June of 2021. So, the entirety of what he's released for Magic Stone Gourmet came out before even a single volume of Sundering Fate came out. So, calling Magic Stone Gourmet a new series in the afterward for any volume of Sundering Fate doesn't make any sense.

So, I don't know what the afterward for volume 2 actually says in Japanese, but I don't see how it could say what the English version currently says about Magic Stone Gourmet being a new series.

Volume 11 - Part 2:

[~31%]

"Seems certainly seems busy,"

Wrong word. Seems > She.

Volume 10 - Part 5:

[49%]

"Got. Sorry for the trouble, Egil."

Missing a word. I suggest the ff:

"Got it. Sorry for the trouble, Egil."

Volume 5 - Part 3:

[3%]

"Can move the church to a place that's more out in the open?"

It's missing a word, I think. I suggest the ff:

"Can you move the church to a place that's more out in the open?"

v7p8 ~12%:

The emperor couldn't afford to simp on his guards for either his wives or the divinity's party, which was certain to leave his resources stretched thin.

simp -> skimp, though it would be really funny were it not a typo.

~58%:

From that point on, the logic of this world was driven into his Charles.

his Charles -> Charles.

V11 P9 (53% - starting on 2nd line up from bottom of page)

"Some icons that didn't seem to do anything."

"that" seems out of place in this sentence. I think there are two ways to make the .sentence work better:

e.g.:

Some icons didn't seem to do anything.
-or-
There were some icons that didn't seem to do anything.

v4 p2

~0%

“I’m very sorry, but we have a rule not to show [] inventors from foreign countries. Even those who hail from the Freja Kingdom... Oh, and please do drink your tea. It’s nothing fancy, I’m afraid.”

Not to show what to foreign inventors? Plans? Blueprints?