Volume 2 Part 7 79%

"We're not children!" Keynerich and I shouted in unison. We were both sixteen years old! And under one hundred fifty centimeters tall!

Is under correct? I know they are short but that statement is contrary to the point they are trying to make.

v13p9 ~100%

Does an angel's rank change based on the number of stones offered.

Should likely be offered? with a question mark.

V6P2 ~74%

Lofus's forceful words silence Alba at once.

Should likely be silenced.

@xdbx said in The Otome Heroine’s Fight for Survival - Corrections Topic:

What is Levinstrike?

Levin is an old-fashioned word for lightning, e.g. levin bolt for lightning bolt. So it isn't wrong.

See: https://www.dictionary.com/browse/levin

Volume 10 Part 6
35% we were obliged demand payment -> we were obliged to demand payment
67% With that, Bishop Damian took Father Conner with him to help the other members of the expedition charge everything into the carriages

while charge is technically a synonym for load or pack, it is rarely used that way.

80% treasure in the Cused Mountain -> treasure in the Cursed Mountain

Volume 14 Part 14
63% I asked whether it was actually okay to let her do this Lunalinde-sama. ->

I asked whether it was actually okay to let her do this. (the xdbx solution) I asked whether it was actually okay to let Lunalinde-sama do this.

74% were apparently on the side -> were apparently on her side
84% lead around a bunch of high-standing, so -> lead around a bunch of high-standing [boys | students], so

As a side note, I was wondering when Tasha was going to figure out that she was in an otome game.

V1P11 ~0%

[...] glowing in the moonlight With a small altar at its center [...]

With the way the sentence is currently written, with should be lower case.

[...] brought about various reactions from the other Guild members But once they'd shared a drink [...]

Should probably be members, but or members. But

V3 P7, 28%
"On his way out, he realised he hadn’t seen Licia yet today. He didn’t want to wake her, but if [she] was already up, he wanted to at least greet her."

@b-scot-morgan said in Fearsome Witch - Corrections Topic:

This isn't really correction, but more of a question:
In Volume 6, at 17% of part 1, Aoi says, "the temporal beings known as spirits."
Would it be better to use the word "ephemeral" instead of "temporal" in this context?

I believe this is a correction, Mr. Morgan. You are quite correct with the word choice in context.

Paraphrasing the context: From the discussion between Aoi and Langus the Elf, it looks to me like Aoi's initial idea of a spirit being a short lived copy of the caster would indeed be described as ephemeral. Several paragraphs later, Langus mentions that this is not the Elven understanding of spirits and that a befriended spirit can watch over a caster even when the caster is not conscious. So, from Langus' perspective, spirits would be temporal or at least something other than ephemeral. The discussion ends with Aoi accepting that her concept of spirits was incorrect and she will have to redo her research.

A2V1P8 ~33%

"The imperial army[...]" Amon murmured.
"It's a little frightening..." Amon admitted.
"We'd die if they ataccked [...]" Nils said fearfully.
"Wow [...]" Ryo cheered.
This was the usual state of these four.

I feel inclined to believe that one of the two Amons should be Eto instead.

~37%

"Love live King Abel!"

Shouldn't this be long?

V4P8 ~67%

"Huh? Things were moving [...]

Misses the closing quotation marks after the question mark.

v2 p5

~55%

“It’s something I don’t consome enough of... The recent cultural transformations have made our lives far easier, but food from across the sea isn’t to my tastes.”

consume

v6 p7

“It is the same skill by which the human nobles use to control their knights, as I’m sure you’re familiar. Some monsters possess it as well.”

That clause doesn't scan. Maybe instead:

It is the same skill as that with which the human nobles control their knights, The same skill is used by the human nobles to control their knights,

V2P4:

0%: her estimation of Sophian couldn’t get any higher, the prince informs her -> informed 33%: With a mighty swing of his sword, he cleaved through wind -> clove 44%: The borrowedd the space for the afternoon. -> they borrowed 67%: her heart absolutely resonating with kindredness, leaned in -> leant

V9.1P6
"Sorry to say it, but yeah." - Since this is Haruka speaking, presumably should be in italic like the others.

v5P2p2:

60% - you’ve got your father-in-law’s visit to prepare for. -> Eh?! Father of her deceased husband? Has Six not figured out the family structure? She’s just calling him “father”… I’ve forgotten a lot of the family tree that Karen’s a part of, but I assume that she knows what she’s talking about (and it’s well covered in that last 40%). :p

v6 p9

~60%

We chatted for a little while after, then I announced, “Well, we’ll head back now. See you around, Miguel.”
“Yep. Catch you later.”
The rest of the team, twins included, called out “See ya!” and “Bye-bye!” as they followed Kuditt. That team was clearly held together by their leader. I’d just hope things didn’t weigh on him too heavily.

then Kuditt announced

V8P7 ~0%

[...] using an off-the-cuff spell to shifta pretty hefty storage shelf […]

Should be shift a.

~16%

Had he prepared in advance laid groundwork with his colleagues, […]

I'm not sure what would be correct here - just a comma after in advance, or only one of the two things (preparing or laying groundwork).

~17%

[…] much impact. it's

Should be It's.

~61%

[…] it was essential that I carry this task through […]

I'm not perfectly sure, but I feel like the more common carried should be used in the inner monologue, though I feel like Emperor Carmine would use the classic formal carry in dialogue.