V7 part 8
[0%] employed by the ancient Astrans to elect their parliament. ➡ senate, maybe, since Astra was the psuedo-Rome of this world? This isn't really a correction so much as a suggestion.
31% - How had they managed to cause so much chaos in the few months I’d be gone? -> Probable wrong word, given the tense: […] in the few months I’d been gone?
V2 P11, 39%
"Without much choice in the matter, I filtered my knights down to a selective few whom I trusted most."
I can't claim that I'm right on this, but my instincts are saying selective -> select
50%
"“Is there something wrong?” Starth asked."
Starth -> Strath
be able to overwhelm him Abel—but Ryo could only tap into that power when he was totally and completely locked in. He couldn’t put himself into that state of mind whenever he wanted, unfortunately, so defeating Abel still remained out of reach. If he had any hope of surpassing him, it would have to be by combining swordsmanship with magic. He had no idea how to do that, though, so he was left with one option: return to the basics.
him Abel — with no punctuation between "him" and "Abel" — does not seem to scan correctly. Maybe it should be something like overwhelm Abel or overwhelm him or overwhelm him —Abel—
This is a general thing, but sometimes the word "female" is used in odd places.
Volume 4 Part 1 Part 7 has sentences like "I'm glad to see another female reaching new heights...." and "I say nothing to females in jest." when it should be "another woman reaching new heights" and "I say nothing to women in jest."
V7P1, 99%: "In the first place, my high offenses didn't mean much" - should probably be just "offense", since we're not talking about a stat rather than a list of crimes.
V4 P2, 28%
"I made my way down into the clearing and over to Sumire just as it started fussing, assumingly out of frustration."
Assumingly -> presumably, or 'I assumed'
