v4p6 ~57%:

The Five Sages ranked along kings and emperors

along -> among

v1p5:

33% - You plan -> Your plan

V10 throughout i.e. part 8 63%:

Camellia has been used constantly when referring to events in Hydrangea, as well as the events that actually took place in Camellia. I don't know if the issue is with the original or confusion from the translator, but it's very confusing to the reader.

14.1

it sounded like her spell’s impotency caused the goblins to burst into chunks

“potency”

“You’re roughly one and half times heavier than everyone else in the party, after all.”

“one and a half”, “anyone”

Our rope ladder had been damaged thanks to the landside,

“landslide”

@Shiroi-Hane Yeah "revive' would work too.

V13P4

50% Its "trunk" (if you could call it that) was pyramid-shaped and there was a glowing gem set where its belly button should be. -> While not technically wrong, the more common term would be 'torso', no?

V7 P11, 61%
"I saw a crack form in the soul recirculator and. Fearing its total collapse, I threw myself in front of it to protect it."
I think that's meant to be 'and, fearing' (or it's a sentence fragment, needing an ending)

V4 P4 (21% - 9th line up from bottom of page)

alt text

Add "you" between would and care for better syntax...
e.g.:

"And would you care to share this reason with us, Sir Iyale?"

v1p5:

89% - Hearing that I”m nasty -> I’m

V7 P5, 47%
"I’m just passing though, but I thought I’d stop by to thank you for all your help during the transport mission."
Though -> through

v6p2 ~13%:

"But desire is anotherright?"

anotherright? -> another, right?

Volume 6, part 7:

8% butand that it was had been Mr Fisher's idea
16% That did proved that Ellie
16% Bbut
16% Assuming Ellie could hear my thoughts right now, I could practically hear herwhat Ellie would say: if she could hear my thoughts right now.
16% Their jet- black darkness -> Their jet-black darkness
16% Elizbeth is a prideful woman -> Elizabeth is a prideful woman
20% I borrowed a horse from the baron's carriage. and took off with Robert and I took off in the direction of the residential district that Yoh had reported seeing Ellie and the witch in last.
24% then maybe all she was doing was using an illusion to to shape herself into whatever that meant for them--, like a perceptual distortion? -> whatever that meant for them, like a perceptual distortion?
24% full- on -> full-on
24% even if they knew, deep down, that she wasn't really the object of their affectionwoman they loved.
24% we probably can't see her "cause -> can't see her 'cause
27% "Lady Lilia," called Robert called, refusing to take his eyes off ofnot looking at Ellie for even a moment.
31% But then there was a loud clang, and Robert's sword launched snapped out of his hands.
31% I panicked, crouching to avoid getting hit, and the sword embedded itself in stabbed a the dirt of a nearby flower bed.
31% I assumed that the fight was over now that Robert had lost his weapon, but he Robert didn't take a single step back.
31% Ellie tried to move out of the way and dodge his punch, but he just kept attacking her with high kicks. She [Delete paragraph break] Ellie managed to block them with her sword hand,

This is as far as I get for now. There are so many errors in this part that I assume they continue.

V5P1P7

Around 56%

"Just how long do you intend to say?"

"say" ought to be "stay" I think.

v18p4:
0%: "" lost... I lost again..." -> extra quote mark and space at the beginning
39%: Pioro had remembered how much I liked the food from Dragonewt -> Dragonewt was previously written as the name of the race/culture, not a place. Might want to change to something like "how much I liked Dragonewt food"
39%: 500 large coins. One large gold coin was worth 10,000 sute, so that came out to 50 million sute -> 5 million (also, double check the rest of the paragraph since there's more coin conversions happening)
71%: Besides, you're already a topic of conversation two meetin's ago -> you were
77%: I kept trotting as I called back to those how spoke to me -> who
84%: cosmetic products like make up -> makeup

v2p10
~13%

Ren couldn't causally get something going either.

Should this maybe have been casually?

~19%

[...] let's go by the fireplace.

They'd move to the fireplace, not by it, in the next sentence.

~38%

"Those guys ain´t got no sense of duty. [...]

The "ain´t" has an acute accent instead of an apostrophe.

V10P11
~12%

The major difference was that the magazine was switched from a fifty-round internal box to a ten-round detachable box.

It's a five round internal, not fifty.

~21%

Acquisition, Technology, & Logistics Agency

I don't think one would use an Oxford comma with an ampersand in a company / government division name.

~29%

However, [...]— His cell phone rang.

The combination of the emdash, the incompleteness of the sentence starting with However, and the uppercase continuation feels off.

A1 V7 P16
~21%

As captain of the reconnaissance unit so, Odoacer had no equal [...]

The so seems a leftover that needs to go.

A1 V7 P17
~66%

Yet he was able to regroup with just a single breath...

He wasn't regrouping. Maybe regain his composure would work better here.
Edit: Or maybe just recoup was intended.

6.2:

"I know---I'll just force the enemy's ships to pull back or scatter.

"I know---I'll just force the enemy's ships to pull back or scatter."

Missing ending double quote.