But they typically have a preference on how they prefer to be identified. (even if it is a call me whatever)
But here we don't know that preference.
The character does not have a choice
But we can tell that he mentally still refers to them as grandchildren. So one could deduce that the same mentality exists as the previous life which would be a stereo typical male.
But this is also a limitation of the english translation being a strongly (relatively) gendered neutral language.
Maybe in raw Japanese we can deduce identify view by the way they speak.
Inglis feels guilty for seeing what a typical male would be guilty of seeing.
And then the same goes (of a steroetypical male) attitude with the squire buddy who is probably interpreting it way differently.